Monday, December 28, 2009

The causes revealed....

Way back many moons ago I was not paying attention in science class. And somewhere in that damn class they taught us about cause and effect. As in every thing must have a cause. So it stands to reason that there is a cause for each of these gray hairs on my head. Right?? Am I way off base here?

Well as bad as I am at talking about myself, I am equally as good at blaming others for my misfortune. So rather than a sappy meet my family post. This will be a look at the reasons I'm looking old.

But before I start let's get the disclaimer out of the way. Obviously I'm not using real names. This is because I will share many embarrasing honest facts of our lives. So to protect the insane innocent, I've given us all nicknames. And before you start bitching, no names are meant or taken offensively. They are my terms of endearment.

Now on to the causes of all my frustration and gray hairs.

First there is Brat. She is a good kid for the most part. When she isn't taken over by those raging adolescent hormones and mood swings. Now Brat has some flaws. Mainly her multiple personalities. As all children do. And sometimes I rant about those. So I'm sure you will see your share of that. But she also has some wonderful qualities. She is one of the most loving and giving children. She would take the shirt off her back and give it to a stranger if they needed it. And that isn't because of her small obsession with nudity. I've always said there are two sides to her emotional nature. She may overreact to the small stuff. But she feels on a huge level. She is also my superstar in training. She seriously wants to be a singer when she grows up. And she does have an awesome singing ability. Fortunately she goes to a great school for the arts where she is only adding to her talent. Right now her biggest interests are Singing, Miley Cyrus, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift (noticing a pattern yet??), the Wii, her friends, texting and yelling at me. But I am a firm believer that children cause gray hair. After all, I didn't have them prior to her.

Next we have Grumpy. Grumpy is the lone male figure in the house. And boy is he outnumbered lucky. Not only does he have all women, but we are all bitches most of the time on occasion. But Grumpy has given me my fair share of gray hairs over the years. The small stuff like the mess made when cooking. I mean really? Do we seriously need hamburger grease on the ceiling?

The only one allowed to have her real name (and only because I'm not creative enough to come up with something for her) is Sophie. Sophie is the ultimate of spoiled lap dog. And it's not the Queen Bee spoiling her. Overall she's quiet. Except when my friend visits. And technically she hasn't given me much grief. But since she's spoiled rotten, and well since she lives here, she made the list.

Now there are others that help add to the gray hairs on a regular basis. This doesn't mean I don't love them. Just that they give me grief through the days. I am sure you will get to know them along our trip. But since they aren't permanent residents, they aren't included here.

See, who says school doesn't pay off. I'm not aging. I have been forced to go gray.


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